Star Trek ZERO

M: This sounds so BADDD!
The proposed story will focus on the early days of James T. Kirk and Spock, including their first meeting at Starfleet Academy and their first mission in space.
its like WHHHHOOOO CCCAAARRRRESSSS
P: but they never went to the academy together. Spock was already on Capt Pike's ship before Kirk took command.
who could they get to play kirk and spock without it looking really realy STUPID!??!?!
M: They put a 90 day FIRING freeze on at my department. How funny is that. we can't fire anyone for the next 90 days.
P: darth vader's powers have been decreased. did you chop his legs and arms off?
no more Miticlorins
M: No, emperor was like dewd, you can;'t keep killing all your generals. Whose going to be left to consrtuct another death star for a small band of Norwegian bears to destroy?
P: are you like Darth Maul? I could be Darth Mall.
Darth Masterbater.
Darth Haul-ass
Darth Diana Krall
M: You are MaDamned President. You're legacy will be He makes bears cry.
P: sound like something from "Dances with Wolves"...
you will DIE when you hear the story about ban-G i have to tell you.
M: Notice how similarly Tell me NOWW!!!
NOWWW!!!
P: We were at bowling last nite, and ban-G was like "couldn't i just stay in your room? instead of going with 'C'?"
and I was like "No, you will have to work it out with 'C'."
This is how ban-G will turn against me and slice me in half with his light saber.
but my prada's will fall to the ground
and i will have turned into spirit form.
anyway, i just wrote an email telling him to stay with "C" and "E".
Mr Happy and Mr. Happier.
heehee
M: dewd, I was trying to explain to banjee boi why "C" is evil. So, I see banjee boi is trying to get some "S" action...
P: perhaps so!
M: bannjee boi better watch it because whne my negative PR campagin rolls out, it goes full FORCE!
You know me and negative PR campaigins... I exagerate stuff by magnituteds.
P: banjee boy number SIX is like a cylon. IMPERVIOUS to anything, even radio interference.
M: not if i cut it off with a scissor and make him a unich.

Rage Against the ban-G

M: lets commit ritual suicide.
P: yes, let's.... but first we must hear from ban-G about how hawt the guy from atlanta was.
The MAN from ATLANTIS
M: i cant bear to hear. as far as im concerned ban-G is dead to me. they didnt exchange words. it was la jeff all over. you should be so much more pissed than you are.
P: You mean I should not share in my little friend's triumph of pheromone-induced landing of yet another fucking SUPER HAWT man? leaving me in the freekin wake? Nay. I think this is cause for celebration.
That guy was SOOOOOOOO HOT. I still can't believe how fast it happened. It was like as impressive as Number Six...
I have to be happy that at least it was ban-G and not Given Name, Samsung, Dirty Devil, or sour PUSSY.
M: the faxt that it was ban-G pissed me even more (in fact his new ip address is number SIX). Because he'll sit there and be like hes a CBer, they're a CBer and do his own CBing in Background Services. He doesnt give anyone else a change to interview because his tongue is thrust out already. its evil.
P: raptor like tongue power.
"background services"... that's pretty good.
i wonder if the man from atlantis will be out tonight or tomorrow night.
M: i have a suspicion you actually went to work today...
P: yes i am in the office. i woke up at 3:30am and could not get back to sleep. I am so tired.
M: Ii can't bear to watch any more. Did they make out for like 2 hours : ( Maybe it felt like that from the pain!
P: Worst Influence just reminded me that he was calling ban-G a "douchebag". HAHAHA!
M: hes a child! what is he even doing in an adult bar? I think that is what I am most outraged about....
P: Worst Influence is like telling me we never went to Ty's. LOL
Could I possibly find some more alcoholic friends?
M: therapy.
P: We got so hammered on Saturday night after Splash.
M: you went to blue room? what is that about?
P: Blue Ribbon. It's a great restaurant that is open til 4am every night. Great food.
M: "C" needs to sever knowledge of angry man. nothing good can come out of that. Nothing. peeps need to manage their contact lists better,
P: it's funny the kind of guys that "C" seems to get into relationships with. Remember "D"? he was sort of young and immature and didn't talk much. And the samme is true of Angry Man.
i am so going to be here for the Webster Hall bingham cup. You better forget about the hamptons that weekend.
M: Why so fracking ban-G can make out with more guys and in front of you? I hope his allowance runs out by then.
I really do.
P: his daddies gave him a credit card. He's completely got a free ride now. I'm jealous.
M: you're not jealous. you;re perturbed.
M: My "friend" Colin went down that path. It destroyed him. Its a sad way to die.
P: i need to find a hot daddy bear who is rich and will make me his huz-gaysian.
M: I was c-blocked by a 25 year old homeless banjee boy. Life is sweet. I guess the plus side is that "R" hasnt been out in a while.
P: banjee boy number six
Banjee boy number Six.
M: din din din din din diiiiiihn diiihhhhhn
din
P: Is he a hallucination? Or real?
Are you going insane?
M: He's as real as the axe I am putting in his head. Ban-G Boi #6